My Filing System

I have filing cabinets.
Upon filing cabinets.
Upon filing cabinets.
Upon filing cabinets.

Filing cabinets filled to the brim with memories.
Experiences.
My life history.

Filing cabinets filled with things I don't want to remember.
Things I do want to remember.
Things I  beg myself to forget.

These filing cabinets have held every single moment in my whole life.
These filing cabinets are like the giant pink elephant in the room.

They always just sit there.
Massive.
Papers flying down from the highest one.

There are days when a file from one specific filing cabinet explodes.
Letting itself be known to me again.
Making me read and remember about the memory it held.

Most of the time these filing cabinets have locks on them.
Padlocks.
Wrapped in barbed wiring.
Wrapped in iron chains.

These filing cabinets if seen from far away,
Looks as though they're holding a monster.

To me they kind of are...
To me my memories are my monster.

My memories hold my secrets.
My mistakes.
My misunderstandings.

It's like these filing cabinets are a security blanket.
A ghostly security blanket,
Haunting me.
Stalking me.
Waiting until the locks had rusted off
Ready to explode.

I have filing cabinets.
Filing cabinets that hold every single moment of my life.
I have filing cabinets that sit with me like a giant pink elephant.

They always just sit there.